Love that Inspires Growth and Hope through Trials
Latest Blog Posts
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So much to unpack... +
Introduction
March 2023 was the start of a spiraling and difficult life. My grandmother began deteriorating fast. And I took that time to become her caretaker. It hasn't been the same since. My mental well-being is not as smooth sailing as I would desire. On January 6th, 2024, my grandmother passed away, leaving me grieving and dreading my birthday which we shared up til now... Yesterday, her last pet passed away peacefully as well. Thus making my anxiety much higher than it already was, if that is even possible. I have been working on moving into my parent's house due to health reasons; both mental and physical and since then, desperately clung to my ability to create, and build communities along with lifting prayers and songs for my peace. Although I am deep in grief, I truly aim to remain active. Despite not wanting to.
Projects
1.) Mental Health Gaming…
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Collection of Resources: Gamifying Your Life +
This is a 10-part series that I am calling Resources of Recovery. And as the title suggests, I’m going to gather resources that have helped me with my recovery or that I think may help others with theirs. In this collection of parts, I will give a short summary of whatever I’m covering and why I believe they help. Thank you for investing time out of your schedule to read and look into these and I hope you enjoy.
Today, I am covering Gamifying Your Life. Alright, so what exactly is Gamification? Well it’s defined meaning is; “the application of typical elements of game playing (e.g. point scoring, competition with others, rules of play) to other areas of activity, typically as an online marketing technique to encourage engagement with a product or service.” As the definition suggests, below are some resources on games (e.g. apps, websites, books, videos, blogs, etc),
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Dear Leaders of the Church +
This letter is written generically to all pastors but originally it was for one pastor. I am writing this because I have gone through this with many churches and I want all pastors to understand why this is wrong and possibly help other Christians with this issue to come to a more welcoming church. Share this with your leaders and help me spread this story. So without further ado a heavily revised letter to all pastors…
Luceo Non Uro,
Dear Pastors and Leaders of the Church and Body of Christ,
We, the Silently Broken are writing you this day because I have an obligation to speak up when we see-- or in this case experience something wrong. As your sister/brother in Christ and as someone who has been called to kill the stigma around mental illness in the church, we have been given this obligation.
“If your brother sins against
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Adulting is peculiar +
So, a lot has happened since I last updated LIGHTforMI. It's always an honour to come back on this ministry. It's been too long and most of the reason is due to extreme depression. So anyhoo, I'm back haha!So, as said on the February link, we moved out of my folks' place. And whilst being on my own, much of the stress from living there has greatly decreased. Coping with my mental illness has been more productive as well. And hitting my one year mark has also been such a great feeling. Picking up different challenges and projects during this time has helped me in my recovery and in other aspects of my life and starting on treating my PTSD and trauma through EMDR therapy… Read More -
High-low, high-low! The Bipolar Life For Me! +
Hello, to all of you. I wrote this, yesterday to give a glimpse of my day to day existence. And I often create things that give you that glimpse as well. Should you want to find more done to express this I'd advice you to visit me on my blogs The Peculiar Tales of a Ragamuffin Warrior Princess , #30daysofbrave challenge(on pause) , and The Oneiric Ambiventure: How it Feels Project , and my journals on wattpad , and the Artisan Chronicles .
What time is it? Where’s my phone? There it is. 2:30PM. Really have to get up at some point. No time like the present… Time to get dressed. It sounds simple to you, but for me, I have two chest-of-drawers one with 9 drawers and the other with 6… giving me 15 in total and there are just bandannas in the top drawers with books and mismatched socks thrown haphazardly in them.
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Open Arms, Open Ears +
I would remain silent but I believe sometimes silence can be read as acceptance. This isn't for me for I've already made my decision to not return the church from whose leaders did this. But instead it is for future people like me who enter.... it is not acceptable nor right for a church to limit any one place in the church for the reason that they are immature, psychologically crippled or anything of the sort. I am absolutely appalled by the behaviour of the leaders of this church. I know that you believe it was for my betterment but truly you are blind to the fact that it was in fact not Christ-like to keep me from fellowship.
… Read MoreYou said I was welcome for worship. But truly what does the whole boundary from fellowship truly say? I was not welcome. I understand where you were coming from and I
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When you relapse.... +
Often times those in recovery are discouraged by the hardest part in recovery.... relapsing. As I feel in this time.... Now, I didn't say that relapsing is the end of recovery or the opposite of it... It is however the most difficult part of it, because you feel like it is the end and that it is the opposite. A relapse feels like a setback. A relapse makes one feel weak. But, this is me speaking to those lies.... When you relapse, it is only the end if you give up. So, this is encouragement to the relapsed recovery warrior. You may have lost the battle, but you've not lost the war! Do not give up, pick yourself up and do the same you did before.... take one day at a time. Overcome each obstacle. And you slip up again, just keep doing it. Although I reached 1 year, 7
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The Big 3-6-5 +
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Yesterday marked my first whole year from cutting! My parents put a lot of effort into a 3-course meal and dessert to celebrate also taping a $15 iTunes gift card too!In a tight time in our finances, I know this was an expensive meal, and appreciated this all the more. The whole thing touched me so much that when I left the room, I was crying a little.
Thankee, mum and daddy. You have no idea how much this touched me! I love you both!
Luceo non uro,
Ari J Schaffer
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Celebrate and Hunger +
Well, today, I am celebrating 11 months being clean. It is amazing to look at my scars and see them as they are... scars that have healed over and be able to be at peace with them. God has brought me out of a great darkness, but this only makes me want to release my other addictions with food and pornography even more. I will be honest, I have not let go of what kept me cutting to begin with and I really long to... My bitterness, hurt and rage towards myself and friends makes it difficult to continue in my recovery. Keep me in your prayers, please, my friends...
Luceo Non Uro,
Arianna
Peace Hunger
by Arianna Joy Schaffer
It's hard to rest after today
The clock ticks as the minutes go by
It's past midnight and I can't even say
Just exactly how I feel tonight
You read
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Well-Intentioned Words +
… Read MoreWell, I have been thinking about the fact that many of my friends have been telling me that they believe God can cure me of my mental illness. And I know this is well intended, however I'd like to emphasize that just because God can do something does not mean he will. Sometimes, God uses these flames (illnesses) to sharpen us in his forge.
Therefore, in order to keep me from becoming conceited, I was given a thorn in my flesh, a messenger of Satan, to torment me. 8 Three times I pleaded with the Lord to take it away from me. 9 But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me. 10 That is why, for Christ’s sake, I delight
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Healing DOES Come +
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Brand New Coping Skills +
Heyuu m'loverlies! Lately has been dedicated to finding replacement coping skills and working towards improving my crafts and arts! It has also been dedicating myself to widening my circle of fellowship. In these days I have focused my skills in writing music, lyrics, poetry, and stories, also in drawing, crafting and seeking out new music bands.
My skills now include:
1. Writing
2. Drawing
3. Colouring pages
4. Writing with a fountain pen
5. Writing songs
6. Listening to songs
7. Reading scripture
What are the skills that help you guys throughout your anxiety, depression or the sort?
And on a side note: I have broadened my circle and made new friends, and though I love to make brand new friends, I miss the ones I've known longer... And I hope to see them again... But at this time, I am glad that things continue well...
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...and we've returned! +
Hey, y'all! I'll be honest, I've been avoiding this ministry with a passion. Not only this ministry, but God. I sought a life of rebellion. Much of it I wish not to post in too much detail, at this time. I have a lot to be honest about with a few people before I post it publicly on this ministry. Anyhow, I am back in gear and allowing God to have me fully once more.
What changed my mind? Well, several things, but the last thing that hit me hard enough to finally rev me up was Celebrate Recovery for this evening... There was a touring band called The Shine Effect there today who gave their testimonies which quickened me once more. Much of what happened in their lives was where I was at that very moment, and I had to wake myself up, change my mind about God, and
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Hello, My Name Is Valerie, and I Am a Recovering Perfectionist +
Yes, that is me. Perfectionist in recovery. I had to start working on it because it was ruining my life. Sometimes I have to say "good enough is good enough" and move on, no matter how much it pains me. So, I make the tough decisions when the dividend is not worth the incredible amount of angst and toil that I go through to get it. When I first returned to college after quite the hiatus, I would get upset over missing a question or two on a quiz. This perfectionist tendency makes the stress almost unbearable. However, I persisted in being upset if I didn't do a perfect job, which means 100% of the points. After my second term, I realized that a mid-A works as well as a high, or perfect, A. Did it still bother me when I did less than perfection? Yes, but the feeling was
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ReNEWed +
Well, well, well... LIGHTforMI has been AWOL for a while, haven't we? Life just got busy and emergencies cropped up. We are fairly settled in and everything is unfurling well. But, anyhoo... I wanted to tell you guys that I started going to New Day Clubhouse , working in the administrative unit ! Life has gotten easier to cope with. Not perfect, but, I am glad to say that I am not allowing myself to stay home too much. :) Meanwhile, I have started many projects in arts, crafting and writing and music as my coping skills... We will be sure to update as soon as we are able, but at this time, I am unsure of where to begin... God bless y'all!
P.S. FEEL FREE TO EMAILS US AT This email address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it. ';document.getElementById('cloakf64dd72b80bf2f336f310820b6cd6567').innerHTML += ''+addy_textf64dd72b80bf2f336f310820b6cd6567+'<\/a>'; OR This email address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it. ';document.getElementById('cloak9fb394ce14f60f8a4f1c3e0aca0eb2e1').innerHTML += ''+addy_text9fb394ce14f60f8a4f1c3e0aca0eb2e1+'<\/a>'; AND SUBMIT YOUR ART , WRITINGS , SONGS , AND TESTIMONIES ! WE WOULD LOVE TO HEAR FROM YOU AND FEATURE YOU ON LIGHT
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"When I was lost... in the depths of darkness...." +
Naruto Shippuden: Sasuke vs Gaara English Dub
'twas a difficult time for me, this month... I have been seriously struggling with my depression. What with losing three friends and having horrific nightmares. I've gotten back into an old obsession-- the anime show; Naruto. When watching the linked scene, it pierced through my heart... "You even rejected the one who tried to help you..." When Gaara was weeping that, I felt like God was speaking to me through that video... It helped me to realize that Jesus is weeping that. I've grieved him greatly.
I constantly gave into my addiction to porn and eroticas and cut a lot but that image of tears in Gaara's eyes reminded me of Jesus. Of course, I know that might sound silly... but God uses all my media choices to reveal images to me. I've gone 7 days without looking at eroticas and porn. Also
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The Addiction of Depression +
Often times I am asked why I am always so depressed and many times I am also asked what triggers my depression. So, I wish to turn this question over to those enslaved to depression. Why are you depressed? What triggers it? These are rhetorical questions for you to ponder on your own...For me, it is often triggered by all the usual things that people deal with and media as well. Most times when I'm triggered , it is by a song that I did not suspect would trigger me, because it used to be a song I'd go to make me happy... But once that one trigger is started, I often go and listen to music that I know will make it worse, just to fuel that feeling.Depression doesn't make sense. We all know this. You want out of it, but you also feel comfortable in it. Feeling… Read More -
Coping in troubled times +
Well, Hello world! Been silent over in LIGHTforMI lately, huh? To be bluntly honest, I have been trying to avoid this entire idea of towing the line of continuing a ministry about mental illness on my own while my mother was in college. In fact, I actually didn't want to continue in the ministry at all. I was kind of falling away from my own therapy and use of coping skills... And so, I thought in light of this truth, I'd talk about what therapeutic skills have helped me personally when depressed.
- Music - I have found that music has impacted my life in wondrous and mighty ways. A few things I really enjoy to do are singing, dancing, playing, and listening to the beauty of the melodies, rhythms and vocals of music. It's in my veins like lightning.
- Reading - I have found that reading is a great escape for me,
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Who We Are
Arianna is a proud authoress, artist, and musician, but the most important thing about her is; she seeks the hidden face of God with a passion. A lover of culture, art, music, and all things geeky and Celtic, her writings are often greatly impacted by these things.
Valerie is the wife of a remarkable man, and the mother of three children, with two of whom having various degrees of mental illness. Valerie is no stranger to mental illness herself as a sufferer of depression on and off for years.