Often times I am asked why I am always so depressed and many times I am also asked what triggers my depression. So, I wish to turn this question over to those enslaved to depression. Why are you depressed? What triggers it? These are rhetorical questions for you to ponder on your own...
For me, it is often triggered by all the usual things that people deal with and media as well. Most times when I'm triggered, it is by a song that I did not suspect would trigger me, because it used to be a song I'd go to make me happy... But once that one trigger is started, I often go and listen to music that I know will make it worse, just to fuel that feeling.
Depression doesn't make sense. We all know this. You want out of it, but you also feel comfortable in it. Feeling free and whole is the unknown, so you rather just stay where you are and survive it, yet you also know you can't keep surviving that way, and you know that the only way out is to go beyond the realm of the known.
It is a confusing emotion, it is always anger turned inwards. That is where the line "I hate myself" comes from, anger towards yourself. It is confusing and addicting. Depression is the drug that needs no money to pay for it. But the price is more costly than money. So that is why there is therapy, because we are so addicted to the hate and anger we have with ourselves, we no longer know how to function without it, so the coping skills have to replace it.
With such information, what will you do with it? You can go on allowing depression to define you, and stay right where you are and never improve. Or you can take a stand for yourself, for others, and chase after the unknown. Depression is like snow, you cannot stop the snow, but you can plow through it in perseverance or you can lock yourself up in your home to avoid it. What is your action here? Ultimately, it is up to you, and you alone.
blog comments powered by Disqus